Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Four Months in Holland



Four (nearly five!) months ago when we first received the Down syndrome diagnosis I was scared and unsure of what the future would hold.  I knew immediately I loved my little 6 lb 11 oz baby burrito but I was scared.  The first several weeks I cried a lot.  Not because I wanted Claire to be different but because I wanted society to be different.  Of course my greatest concern was her immediate physical health, especially potential heart problems.  Once we knew she was healthy (thank you, God!!), my biggest fear was how the world would treat her.  Will she be laughed at?  Will she be excluded from birthday parties and sleepovers?  Will I watch her heart break in a million pieces because she’s left out?  I cried.  My other fear was about her long-term future.  What happens when Blake and I are gone?  Who will care for my baby?  I cried more.  These were lots of heavy emotions, especially for a new mom.  The more I cried, the more I held my little girl.  Countless tears fell on her sweet little cheek in the beginning. 


Days turned into weeks and weeks into months.  Four amazing months filled with love, laughter and sleepless nights. At 7 weeks Claire started school and therapy at Miracle Kids; at about 10 weeks she started smiling at us; at 12 weeks she started cooing and at 13 weeks she rolled over for the first time.   Lots of sweet little firsts for my little girl.  


Her dad and the boys call her Claire Bear and I have nicknamed her Little Bit.  Without a doubt her favorite  hobby is eating J  She has more than doubled her weight and grown over 5 inches!  My little bit is not so little anymore.  She loves bath time and we take one together every night.  Definitely one of my favorite parts of the evening.  She watches me so intently as I sing to her.  I think she will be a water baby and I can’t wait for next summer to get her to the pool. 


Have I mentioned that she LOVES to eat?  She quickly outgrew her cute little newborn clothes and is now in 3-6 month.  But not for long.  When her legs are stretched out they are at the end of her little sleepers.  


I still don’t know what the future holds.  I know she may be teased, but what kid isn’t.  She might not go to every party or sleepover but neither will Austin.  What I do know is the tears of fear and worry have been replaced with grins and giggles.  We love our little bit to pieces and so will everyone who meets her.  I have no doubt.  I mean look at this smile, what’s not to love???